New Year’s Eve always gets me thinking, “Why the hell do I live in Chicago?! It’s so freaking cold outside; I want to curl into a ball!”
In reality, this time of year gets me thinking, “How could I have spent the last three weeks eating only cookies? My pants don’t fit, I’m sweating cookie batter, and I’m starting to look like a ball!”
In all seriousness, it gets me thinking, “Christmas vacation is over already?! I left a huge pile of work on my desk, I can’t face getting back to it, my boss (Kelly) is a tough cookie–actually, don’t mention cookies–and the only thing I have left to look forward to is a dropping ball!”
New Year’s Eve is hot garbage, but New Year’s Day is one of my favorites. Is NYE technically even a holiday? My best New Year’s Eve ever ended with me falling in a puddle of puke in midtown Manhattan and–due to the million plus people all looking for a cab at the same time–walking home covered in frozen vomit. And that was the best NYE I’ve ever had. (The rest of the night was really fun.)
New Year’s Day, though! I prefer to celebrate the start of a brand new year instead of the close of another. And if you’re able to see through that hazy hangover, today is a day to start planning ahead. (Though I’ll likely keep accidentally writing “2017” instead of “2018” for at least a few months.)
So today, I’d like to give my sick wife the day off, and publicly declare my resolutions as a way of pressuring Future Mitch into behaving himself.
Mitch’s 8 New Year’s Resolutions for 2018:
- Watch more TV: In 2018, I vow to watch more television. In 2016, we built the perfect living room and I was prepared for full-on TV binging bliss, but that same year, we had a baby… and then 2017 was the year of the clumsy toddler. And while I’ve seen Moana over 100 times, I’ve made absolutely no progress on the TV front. “Mindhunter,” “Ozark,” “Game of Thrones,” “The Crown,” “Handmaid’s Tale,” “Stranger Things” and “This is Us” are on the list! Any other suggestions?
- Cook: I’m out of excuses. I have a brand new kitchen, I live with two hungry ladies (three if you count Noodle) who won’t eat unless I cook, and I have a job that requires me to cook. Some of my 2017 cooking accomplishments include giving myself food poisoning and cutting my hand so badly I got stitches. (#mitchesgetstitches) But 2018 will be the year of Cookin’ with Mitch! I’m bringin’ it back.
- Learn how to play guitar: Did you know that Kelly has a beautiful singing voice? Oh, and she plays the guitar beautifully. On top of all that, she is the most impressive whistler I’ve ever met in real life. If she wasn’t busy blogging, I could picture her busking in the park like my man Bert from “Mary Poppins.” When Kelly plays music with Emma, my heart absolutely melts, but I have to just stand there like an idiot. So in 2018, I vow to learn the basics on the guitar so we can start a family band. (Yeah. I just said that.) I may even buy a bus!
- Write: I’m digging this whole “part-time professional blog husband” thing I’ve got going on, but in 2018, I’d like to learn how to use a semicolon; how to-properly hyphenate-, and to stop using run-on sentences because it is bad form and I should really know better because yeah see how I just go on and on? I’ve started to love writing, and this year, I’d like to go from “writer when Kelly needs a break” to plain old “writer.”
- Give back: I spent most of my adult life teaching math to inner city New Yorkers and Chicagoans. But now, after a few months out of the classroom, I’d like to I find an outlet to plug the hole that teaching used to fill. There’s just so much to get involved with! Tutoring with Chicago Public Schools, special recreation at the Anixter Center, volunteering with the Lakeview Pantry, and donating to Donors Choose are all on the list for 2018.
- De-clutter: Our house is full. If we try and put another thing in our house, the door will bust open and the windows will break. I want it all out! I don’t even know where to begin. We run two small businesses out of this place and as the blog grows, so does Kelly’s closet. Not to mention Emma’s toys! Maybe we should just move? But seriously: we’ve started purging and it feels great.
- Be a good husband: Society doesn’t really discuss the job of “husband” as much as it should. There are no songs or movies exploring the depths of the husband. I’d like to think that I used to be a pretty good one! But my new “father job” is absolutely stomping out my old husband job, and I’d like to get back to the husband role as much as possible in 2018. Find a balance, really.
- Be a good father: That being said, I think the most important resolution I hope to achieve in 2018 is that of learning to be a better father. Emma is an awesome kid, and I can’t wait to take on the new year together. I know there’ll be plenty of craziness and struggle in 2018, and I need to be there with patience and kindness to pull it all off and love every second of it.
Is it not terrifying that we are 18 years deep into the 2000’s? How is that even possible? I’d love to hear about your resolutions in the comments section below! I hope everyone has a relaxing New Year’s Day and an amazing 2018!