Cyber Monday For Him by Mitch

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Mitch here!

It’s Cyber Monday! But who uses the word “cyber” anymore? Today really should be renamed “we are all back at work after a four-day weekend and hopelessly looking for online distractions” day. Well, have no fear! Mitch’s Cyber Monday Electronics Guide is here! Below, you’ll find 40 gifts for that incredibly difficult-to-shop-for guy.

Guide To Cyber Monday For Him:

  1. Amazon Echo Show: Talking to a computer is cool, but looking at a talking computer is so, so much cooler. $50 off today, so act fast!
  2. Xbox One S: With one purchase, you get one of the best gaming devices ever created and the newest Star Wars game. If your guy doesn’t like video games or Star Wars, then you don’t know him that well. He does.
  3. Amazon Echo Spot: Why would I link to an unreleased $124 alarm clock that won’t ship until a week before Christmas? Good question!
  4. Amazon Echo: The answer is because I’m obsessed with these talky cylindrical assistants in a tube. $20 off the newest incarnation if you buy today.
  5. Amazon Prime: You can give Amazon Prime as a gift, people. I repeat: Prime. As. A. Gift.
  6. Bose SoundLink Wireless Headphones: My life is filled with exceptionally loud noises. I’d like to record the sound of quiet and play it back over these noise cancelling headphones. Ahhhhh.
  7. August Smart Lock Pro + Connect: The sidewalk to my front door feels like a thousand miles. 1) Dog up stairs 2) Dog tied off 3) Baby out of stroller 4) Dog Untied 5) Look for keys 6) Realize keys are in a pocket so far away that Houdini couldn’t reach them 7) Buy a smart lock that just lets me in the stupid house.
  8. Roomba 980 Robot Vacuum: A robot vacuum qualifies as a “we are living in the future” kind of product. If you are truly struggling to find your guy a gift, give yourself the gift of a clean house while simultaneously giving him the gift of more couch time.
  9. Fitbit Alta HR: A Fitbit is a great gift. It gives a solid “You’re out of shape and I don’t want you to die” kind of message while simultaneously being cool and techie.
  10. Kindle: Isn’t it crazy? A Kindle costs only $50 today. You can click a few buttons and be off in Narnia, or Westeros or in Christian Grey’s lair in mere days!
  11. Kindle Unlimited: If you told 12-year-old Mitch that one day he could have unlimited access to millions of books, audiobooks and magazines shared across all of his devices for $10/month, he’d be like “Why would I pay for books?” But here we are!
  12. Kindle Oasis: And for you serious readers who don’t mind dropping paper (see what I did there?), there is the Oasis. The Oasis is waterproof, though I’m not sure if it is bubble bath proof. I’ll be right back.
  13. Fire HD 8 Kids’ Edition: There are moments in my life when I would pay $10,000 for a baby distraction. This one only costs $90 today.
  14. Sonos One: I literally wrote a fan letter to the CEO of Sonos earlier this year. And that was before I knew about the “One.” I dragged Kelly to the Sonos store in New York to play with it and it is, you know, freaking awesome.
  15. Smart Nora Anti Snoring Solution: From one snorer to another, it is time to do something about it! This thing apparently works and, let’s be honest, it’s worth the money. Enough is enough!
  16. Samsung Wireless Charging Pad: If your guy is rocking a new iPhone, then it has wireless charging. Is plugging a phone in enough of a hassle to necessitate spending $40 on a charging pad? No. But as a gift this thing is dope!
  17. Echo Dot: Congratulations! You’ve just drawn your 15-year-old cousin in the family Secret Santa draft. You don’t know this kid. Honestly, you aren’t really sure what his name is. He used to be a baby and now he’s teenager trying to grow a beard. Boom! Echo Dot. $29 today and you can just ship it to his house wrapped. Because you can’t wrap for anything.
  18. Ring Video Doorbell Pro: I bought a Ring doorbell in the hopes of tricking Noodle into pacifism. It didn’t work. But tangentially it does help us coordinate the countless deliveries Kelly receives each week.
  19. Fire TV Stick with Alexa Voice Remote: If this thing existed in the 90s, we all wouldn’t have had to spend our Friday nights watching Family Matters. Just saying. TGIF indeed.
  20. Nintendo Switch: My buddy Tom went out for groceries and came home with a Switch a few weeks ago. He the proceeded to play Zelda for a series of weeks in a row. Tom does not have a kid. I do have a kid.
  21. Tile: Key Finder: Emma has always loved keys, but only recently has she discovered the garbage can. Keys and garbage cans don’t mix! Enter Tile, the key garbage can antidote.
  22. Kindle Fire HD 8: $50 for an 8″ tablet is insane, but the deal is only good if you buy today! I’m considering buying one for each room of the house just in case. Kelly doesn’t know this and I highly doubt she’ll make it to #22 in this post so I’m good.
  23. Playstation 4 Slim: Your mission is to figure out which gaming console your guy prefers. Honestly, this maneuver will be extraordinarily difficult for you to pull off without spoiling the surprise. You know what? Just buy him this one. This one is perfect (and it comes with Star Wars, too).
  24. Wemo Smart Plug: For $25 (today only!), you can tell Alexa to turn off that annoying light in your house. That one at the top of the stairs that you always get out of bed for. Yeah, that is Alexa’s problem now.
  25. Fire TV 4K Ultra: If there is room in the budget this is the TV box you should shove in that stocking. A little extra money and you’ll “future proof” your TV to make sure that when you watch Moana for the fifth time in a single day, it will leave you feeling truly inspired.
  26. Furbo Dog Camera: Noodle is fat now. Hundreds of Emma meals being tossed to the floor have made sure of that. She also hates doggy treats now because they don’t taste as good as chicken nuggets. Anyway, this camera will let you interact with your pup when you’re out and even toss treats via mobile!
  27. Amazon Gift Card: Listen. You’re busy. I’m busy. We’re all busy. You don’t have time to figure out what your aunt wants for Christmas. She doesn’t want a puzzle I’ll tell you that! Just give her this cute little snowman Amazon Gift Card. She will love it. Good effort!
  28. Ricoh Theta: Isn’t it strange that people marveled over magnesium-flashed grainy black-and-white film only 100 years ago? What will everyone think of our artificially intelligent bunny ear selfies in 100 years? This camera takes full on 360-degree stills and videos to make sure that historians thousands of years from now remember your birthday party like you’d prefer them to.
  29. eero Home WiFi System: Have you ever lived in a place with terrible WiFi? The kind of WiFi where you have to hold your phone up in the air in bed and then when you fall asleep, it smacks you in the face? eero solves all that. (Do they even capitalize it at the beginning of a sentence?!) Stick one of these guys in every dead spot you have, and enjoy a warm blanket perfect Wi-Fi service.
  30. Dyson Fan Heater: Maybe your spouse isn’t as serious about space heating as mine is–as I write this Kelly is literally hugging a candle–but a super space-aged heater is just what we need in this house.
  31. HTC Vive: If you gave your guy a proper Virtual Reality System this year, you’d be the queen of all Christmases from this day forward. As an added bonus, he will be silently tweaking in his headset for the next few months. Win win?
  32. Disney Circle: We aren’t there yet, but if you have kids of a certain age, you may want to protect them from certain portions of the internet, or just have a meal together for once! I’m just lucky Circle didn’t exist when I was a kid.
  33. Chromebook: A laptop for under $200 is nice, but a machine this nice with the full power of Google behind it is a miracle.
  34. Philips Wake-Up Light: The daily wake-up is not my proudest moment, but maybe with a tech trickery, I could come out of the morning with more dignity. And less whimpering.
  35. Fire HD 10 Tablet: Mitch! We get it. You like tablets! Leave it alone! Well this is the one I bought. The biggest and best one. And it’s only $100!
  36. Amazon Cloud Cam: Amazon recently announced a service that works with this camera to allow for indoor package delivery. I don’t know about you, but that stoop is looking mighty daunting right about now.
  37. Canon Eos Rebel: When you’re married to a photographer, it is easy to see the benefits of owning a proper camera. When you’re an unsuspecting gift-receiver, a camera just might be the thing that gets you to develop a hobby. Who knows?!
  38. Macro Lens: Or maybe your guy just wants to take amazing pictures on his phone. Either way!
  39. Sony 55″ 4K Smart TV: It happens! Every 10 years or so, a need emerges. A couple will look into each others eyes and say, “I think we need a new TV.” Well, this is the TV that you need. Click this button and they’ll bring it right to your house. Click a few more buttons, and they’ll hang it on a wall for you.
  40. Lightning Cable: Wow. We made it. 40 items in and you are still reading this thing. Welp, if you haven’t found a gift for your guy yet, I’m offering you this. A good phone charging cord. It won’t fray or break in half and he’ll think of you every time he charges.

Congrats to Angela H. for winning the giveaway!

Mitch out!

See also: Casual Preppy Holiday Outfit.

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