Mitch here!

As Father’s Day is a few days away, it’s time for me to get real with you about something: Dads need coffee. Need. That’s why I’m teaming up with today’s sponsor, Keurig Green Mountain®, to promote quality coffee for all the dads out there in desperate need of caffeination.

Summer break starts on Tuesday at 4 p.m., so I’m feeling pretty upbeat right now. There’s sleep on the horizon! But as I type this, pre-break, I’m in rough shape. I’m working full-time, juggling two small businesses, attempting to help around the house, and trying to be a good husband and father. I’m having a lot of fun, but I’m still just as tired as I was the last time I complained to you in a Mitch post.

When I drive home from work, I look forward to red lights so I can rest for a second. My students make fun of me for staring off into space, lost in thought… but the truth is that in those fleeting moments of restful contemplation–in the deep recesses of my consciousness–I’m daydreaming about sleep. You know that feeling when you stay up too late and you feel a little bit off in the morning? Nauseous? Dehydrated, no matter how much water you drink? Foggy? I feel like that times a billion. I think my body might be shutting down, haha.

Crap! I literally just fell asleep while writing this post, laptop and miniature dachshund on my lap. Okay. Let’s get back to it.

Not only do I want, love, desire, cherish and enjoy coffee, I need coffee. A fresh cup in the morning, a cup to wash down the first cup, and then a cup for dessert. As a matter of fact, I’m going to go make a cup right now.

Let me paint a picture of a typical morning in the Larkin Household:

Kelly and I cling to our bed in desperation, terrified that the baby monitor is about to go off. If we’re lucky, Emma sleeps until 7. When she does wake up, Kelly and I take turns trying to manipulate the other into going to get her. After I lose, I groggily rush up the stairs to get her… but the coffee must be made first or there will be no coffee. So I’m scooping coffee grounds like I’m in some kind of Steven Spielberg movie and time is running out. Just as Emma starts to wail and Kelly is coming up the stairs to ask me why I haven’t yet gotten the baby, I finish with the stupid coffee machine and make my way into the nursery.

I neither have the time, attention span or expertise to brew coffee using a traditional machine. I typically scoop enough coffee grounds into coffee filter until it “looks like enough” and then I forget to put the water in until a weird smell starts to waft from the kitchen to remind me that I’m an idiot. What eventually makes it into my mug barely resembles coffee. When we have friends over, they turn my coffee down.

My brother is a coffee guy. He’s up with the newest coffee trends and always has some new gadget to mess with. Me: “What the heck is that thing?”

Him: “Well, Moron, this device improves your coffee’s PH quotient to enhance the abstraction rate at which water turns into coffee. Mitch, I can’t believe we came from the same planet, let alone family.”

(He also has three kids, which makes him a super human.)

There must be a better way.

Enter the Keurig® K475 brewer.

Just look at this thing. This brewer has straight-up changed my life in the last month. It can’t put the baby to sleep or help to get her get dressed for the day, but let’s be honest: half the time, neither can I. It can, however, solve all of my caffeine-related problems, namely not having enough caffeine in my bloodstream.

Now, instead of frantically spilling coffee grounds all over the counter while Emma tries to get my attention, I simply pop a K-Cup® pod into the gorgeous thing and go about my morning.

The Keurig® brewer makes an incredibly good cup of coffee and is so simple to use that even I can’t screw it up. My personal favorite is The Original Donut Shop®. I must confess that if given the chance, I would eat a dozen donuts in one sitting. It was a sad day when I realized donuts were on the “under no circumstances can Mitch eat one of these things or else he doubles in size” list. This coffee reminds me of my donut-eating days, though. I challenge my brother, the coffee scientist, to make a better cup of coffee than The Original Donut Shop® does.

I want to thank Keurig® for teaming up with us for this post as well as for solving all of my coffee problems. This coffee is so good I feel like growing a handlebar mustache; moving to Williamsburg, Brooklyn; riding a fixed-wheeled bicycle; and misspelling people’s names on the sides of paper cups.

And yes: the Keurig® K475 Coffee Maker brewer would make a fantastic Father’s Day gift!

Mitch. Out.

^ Yes, we took this with a tripod! Feat of the week. ;) Outfit details here.

This post was sponsored by Keurig Green Mountain®, but all opinions are our own. As always, thank you so much for supporting the partnerships that keep Kelly in the City up and running!